A woman is 25 years older than a man, examples. Multi-age marriage

Content

Modern women take very good care of themselves, which is why they look much younger at 40 years old. That is why today there are often unequal marriages when the husband is younger than his wife. And such relationships have long ceased to attract the attention of others, as the people say: “All ages are submissive to love.”

Positive sides

The main positive advantage of an unequal marriage, when the wife is older than the husband, is the young spouse. He has a special effect on his wife, she blossoms and always tries to look perfect, keep herself in shape, be beautiful and well-groomed. In addition, she is always in a great mood, there is an incentive - this is a young husband who needs to live up to.

An unequal marriage with an older woman has another advantage. Compared to young girls, after 40 years she is able to identify the strengths and weaknesses of her beloved husband. She forgives him for many of his shortcomings, can give advice and act as a friend. An adult wife will not constantly touch her husband’s weak points; she will not look for reasons to start trifling scandals. As for the financial side, an older woman has already asserted herself, she does not need the help of her husband, on the contrary, she can help him herself, for example, to succeed in his career or open his own business.

There is a positive side to an unequal marriage that directly concerns the wife. To look good next to her lover, she attends various procedures and follows an established daily routine. And this only has a positive effect on women’s health. Many women who are older than their husbands even use plastic surgery services.

Disadvantages of Unequal Love

A full-fledged family is when there are children. But not every woman can give birth to a baby, say, after 40 years. Now, if the husband is 25-30 years old, then he will definitely want to prolong his family line. The fact that modern unequal relationships have ceased to attract the attention of others is normal, but the question arises - is a future possible for such a couple? This question concerns a non-beloved couple who have a three year age difference. This applies to those who have a difference of no less than 10 years. But such relationships have not only disadvantages, but also advantages.

Many men prefer an older woman, because this way they feel protected, they feel comfortable, as if under the wing of their own mother. But sooner or later they grow up and create their own family home, so they find a younger life partner. While the husband lives with his older wife, he tries to avoid any responsibility, which is why he prefers such a relationship.

In addition, more often young guys agree to an unequal marriage due to the fact that the future wife is a wealthy and successful woman. Thus, in order to achieve certain heights and success, they will take advantage of her position. The woman, in turn, will constantly suspect her husband and not trust him. As a result, in order not to suffer for a long time, you will need to either confirm your suspicions or refute them.

The worst enemy of an unequal marriage is time, which is merciless towards a woman. No amount of money will help her stay young, beautiful and attractive. The man will look like a real handsome man for a long time, and his wife will grow old. But not all marriages break up precisely because of this; many husbands and wives cannot find common interests and worldviews. This applies not only to relationships where the wife is older than the husband, it also affects ordinary marriages. The younger generation loves to relax with friends, go to parties and drink, and stay out until late. A successful older woman, about 35, is already tired of such entertainment, and her young husband’s friends seem banal to her.

If you believe scientists, then based on the results of surveys among the population, they found out that most often young people, at the age of 25, for example, are forced to pay attention to the older female sex, up to 40 and above. One reason is sexual activity. In men, the peak occurs at the age of 25 years. For women, sexual activity begins at age 35. In addition, older ladies are attracted to young guys by the fact that they are easy to contact, frank and independent, unlike their peers.

No stereotypes!

If you look at the statistics on divorces, you can see that family happiness does not depend on the age of the spouses. And if you look around, you can meet a huge number of women at the age of 45, who in appearance and cannot hold a candle to 25 year old girls. And this is not surprising; a busy life will benefit not only teenagers, but also older women, especially if the relationship with the man they love goes well. To be honest, sex has never harmed anyone; it makes a woman even more beautiful and healthy.

An older man has a hard time with adventures with young girls. This affects not only his intimate life, but also his health, especially if he has heart problems. The young man is much stronger, has increased self-control, and is unlikely to have sexual problems. And when an unequal relationship falls apart and ends quickly, a wise woman will not notice this, she will remember them as an exciting and vibrant adventure in her life.

Underwater rocks

An unequal marriage is tested every day; the factors that can destroy such a relationship are much greater than it seems. Intimate life will continue as long as the wife surprises her chosen one. The external factor is not so easy to hide if the wife looks older than her husband. Then you have to use the services of a plastic surgeon, especially if nature has not given you the opportunity to look younger than your age. When the age difference is difficult to hide, even the most stable nervous system may not withstand constant questions.

Friends and family

Even friends can undermine an unequal marriage. On the adult wife’s side there will be friends who, day after day, will try to win the young husband over to their side. As a result, one of the friends will succeed. The company of the young husband's friends will also not be beneficial; the wife will stand out against their background. Thus, it is advisable to minimize communication with friends or to be friends with couples who have a similar situation.

Relatives of the wife or husband may perceive an adult woman or young man with hostility. If only a baby appears in an unequal marriage, then relatives may change their opinion to the opposite.

Features of life

An older woman should understand that money plays the biggest role in an unequal marriage, especially if she is successful and rich. As long as there is money, then there will be love. When finances run out, the young man will look for love on the side. But, for example, a common cause, business or partnership can prolong unequal relationships for a long period of time.

It is very important that the young husband and adult wife have at least some common interests. Not many people from different generations can boast that they have common hobbies. Even couples of the same age can be carried away in different directions, what can we say about an unequal marriage. But if common interests are completely absent, then such an alliance will not last long.

When a man and a woman are in love, it doesn’t matter who is what age, the main thing is that there is mutual understanding. She turns a blind eye to some things on the part of her young husband, but he can be constantly jealous of her, at the same time, achieve full status, so that they do not think of him as a dependent. In an ordinary marriage, if the age difference is small, over the years, the wife and husband become similar to each other, so all problems are smoothed out faster. In simple words, they find a compromise, which is also important both in simple relationships and in marriage.

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It is written under the cortex of our brain that only people of the same age can marry. Therefore, when we see a couple of different ages, it seems unnatural and causes surprise. There are families where the man is 10, 20, or even 30 years older than the woman, and there are not so few of them.

Let's try to understand where these exceptions come from. Let's start with female psychology.

Women are divided into three groups according to their behavior in marriage:

"Wife" is the most common type of woman in marriage. Such women, as a rule, marry people of the same age. In marriage, they behave as equal partners.
"Mother". Such a woman often has a leading position in marriage. The spouse in such a marriage plays a less significant role. A mother woman often takes care of, decides, and controls. In such families, it is not uncommon for the man to be younger than the woman.
"Daughter". A woman-daughter chooses as her life partner a person who is much more experienced and, accordingly, older than herself. The reason is the need for care, protection and patronage.

Man 10 years older

A woman by nature develops faster. And it turns out that peers do not meet either the psychological or intellectual needs of girls.

That's why they like much older men. Twenty-year-old girls are interested in thirty-year-old young men. They are drawn to them for experience, intelligence, maturity.

It would be a stretch to call such a couple peers, but still they are both representatives of the same generation. They have common music, movies and heroes. In this couple, the man is the more experienced partner, he knows a lot and much better.

Such couples are not uncommon in society and do not cause surprise. In the traditions of the past, an age difference of 10 years was considered the standard.

A man 20 years or more older

Such a man will be chosen as a husband by a woman who is in great need of protection, support, and patronage.

Definitely, this is a woman-daughter who, in adulthood, still feels like a child, weak and defenseless. Perhaps the feeling of insecurity was born in childhood, especially if there was no father in the family. Implicitly, the “little girl” is looking for this strong image in a man - the image of a father. Therefore, a man 15, 20, or even 30 years older will attract her.

General factors for choosing a relationship with an older man

Personal and financial viability.

A man aged forty or more already has financial well-being, a successful career and material well-being. It is initially comfortable to start family life with such a man. A woman is aware that a wealthy, serious adult man can fully guarantee a stable, serious marriage in which she can safely plan for children.

Readiness for marriage, maturity.

A man 15 years older or more attracts with his serious attitude towards life and marriage. He values family comfort and all the preferences of the family as such. Such men are wiser, they have previous experience in personal relationships. They are capable of compromise.

The ability to look after beautifully.

If a man is much older, he is more experienced in dealing with women. He knows how to please, what gifts and flowers to give.

High social status.

There are also cases when women choose a husband much older than themselves, focusing on his professional and life success. For example, young actresses marry older, venerable directors. Nurses - for famous surgeons, and so on.

Here the image of the spouse is idealized due to his high objective assessment. A man as a luminary of science or art is attractive precisely for this reason. A person who has earned the honor and respect of a huge number of people arouses respect and interest. The authority of such a husband for his wife is enormous. As well as admiration for his professional skills.

A relationship with an older man promises a young woman help in her own career or creativity.

Feeling of security

When marrying an older man, a woman feels under guardianship and protection. Almost 100% of the leader in such an alliance will be a man. There will be decision making and leadership roles. This is very appealing to pronounced “daughter” type women who are afraid to be decisive and mature.

There are significant disadvantages to marriages where the husband is older than the wife

Difference of interests

One of the main problems is the obvious gap in interests. This is due to the fact that if a man is 13 years older, the husband and wife are people of different generations. Each of them grew up listening to different music, different fairy tales, and reading different literature. In adulthood, they form different social circles according to their age.

At the initial stage of family relationships this is not noticeable. The couple are passionate about their passion. After a few years, when the first flair of love wears off, these problems appear in almost every family of different ages. They become difficult and bored with each other.

Physiological (sexual) problems

If at 20 years old a wife quite normally perceives a difference with her husband of 20 or more years, then after 10 years this difference can turn into a problem.

A 30-year-old woman at the peak of her physical fitness and a 50-year-old man in the process of sexual decline: how can they be fully together? The sexual appetites of a young woman and the desire for peace of a 50-year-old husband create conflicts in the family.

Different energy

This is directly related to age. The young partner longs for development, growth, movement, while the other is already tired of the race of life and, on the contrary, is looking for a quiet haven and peace.

It turns out that the young wife, by the age of forty, has built a successful career, is full of energy and positivity, and her elderly husband is already a pensioner who prefers a sofa and a book. The different rhythm of two people is a threat to such a marriage.

It is good if the adult spouse turns out to be active and active to match the young wife. In this case, the marriage will be strong.

Premature aging

It has been noticed that a young wife next to her older husband becomes older purely visually and internally. They seem to change energy. She gives him youth, and he gives her maturity. With an adult husband, a young wife becomes calmer, more leisurely, and more sedate.

Jealousy

In such relationships there is almost always a place for jealousy. The unequal positions of both lead to mistrust and neurosis. An older spouse may be jealous of a younger spouse, realistically assessing his and her sexual needs.

Unequal marriage. Non-acceptance of relationships on the part of relatives, friends and society in general.

The young girl’s family will dissuade her from such a marriage, citing the age difference that is growing over time. Friends of an adult man will suspect the young wife of self-interest.

The man's past

Another disadvantage in a relationship with an older man is his past. As a rule, a man has an unsuccessful marriage and, possibly, children behind him. This relationship will not disappear without a trace from his life. The young wife will have to come to terms with the fact that their ex-wife and children from a previous marriage will constantly appear in their family life. And this is a difficult load.

To create normal family relationships, a young wife will need a large amount of wisdom, tact and patience.

Why do men marry young women?

Increasing self-esteem in your own eyes and in the eyes of society.

A man who has married a woman much younger than himself thus proves his worth in many areas of life, for example, in sex, in social status. A young wife nearby is proof of a man’s success.

An opportunity to deceive age and become younger.

With a young wife, a man feels much younger. He begins to monitor his health and appearance in order to match his wife. He has an influx of energy and positivity.

Raising an ideal wife.

An adult man, as a rule, already has experience of family life and divorce. His attitude towards the female sex was formed under the yoke of negative personal experience, where a woman acted as an irritant and a source of problems. In this regard, a man is pessimistic about his peers, considering them already formed individuals with whom it is not easy to find a common language and build good relationships.

With a young girl everything is much simpler. The character is not fully formed, the young diva looks at the experienced man with undisguised delight and admiration. In such a couple, a man feels more confident and stronger. He plays a leadership role. He takes care of, patronizes, manages, and teaches.

Also, many men, having married a young girl, idealize the upcoming marriage and see in their wife only a kind, caring housewife who will constantly be busy with the family nest.

Sometimes such men have a hard time seeing in their wife a mature adult who needs a career and her own separate life.

Having described all the pros and cons of a relationship with an older man, it should be noted that around us there are plenty of examples where a man is much older than his wife.

Here are some of the famous couples:

Lydia Tsirgvava and singer Alexander Vertinsky. The age difference is 34 years. Two daughters were born and raised in the marriage: beautiful actresses Marianna and Anastasia Vertinsky.
Director Oleg Tabakov and actress Marina Zudina. The age difference is 30 years. Married for over 20 years, two children: Maria and Pavel.
Director Andrei Konchalovsky and actress, TV presenter Yulia Vysotskaya. The age difference is 36 years. Together for over 20 years. The marriage produced two children: Mary and Peter.
Hollywood actors Michael Douglas and Catherine Zeta-Jones. The age difference is -25 years. They have two children: 12-year-old Kari and 15-year-old Dylan. Together for more than 15 years.
Fashion designer Roberto Cavalli and model Lina Neilson. The age difference is 47 years. Together for more than 6 years.
Directed by Woody Allen and Soon-Yi-Previn. The age difference is -35 years! The couple has been happy together for many years and has 2 children.
Singer Alexander Gradsky and Marina Kotashenko. The age difference is 32 years. They have been together for 12 years, and last year the couple had a son, Alexander.

All of the above couples have proven their love over time.

And how many examples of new unions where husbands are old enough to be fathers to their wives, or even grandfathers. Only time will tell how strong this amazing relationship turned out to be:

Armen Dzhigarkhanyan and Vitalina Tsymbalyuk-Romanovskaya (age difference - 45 years)
Ivan Krasko and Natalya Shevel (age difference - 60 years)
Bari Alibasov and Victoria Maksimova (age difference - 40 years)

Alexander Sergeevich Pushkin wrote back in the 19th century: “All ages are submissive to love...”. Centuries replace each other, but love remains. Only mutual respect, tact and wisdom will help preserve this feeling for years.

And the age difference is just numbers. Let them remain so, on paper!

Recently, there are more and more unions in which the woman is much older than her companion. Someone looks at such a marriage with a grin, someone with sympathy, and someone is sure in advance that nothing good will come from such an “unequal” marriage. So is there a future for such relationships?

European sociologists noted that already at the beginning of this century, in every third couple going down the aisle, the bride was older than her chosen one. And in the United States, a third of unmarried women date younger men. The reason for this is the current emancipation of women. Most often, a woman marries a man who is much younger, when she is not at all interested in the material side of the relationship. As a rule, such women have established careers, are provided with housing and a stable income. Consequently, support from a wealthy spouse is not so important to them. It's no secret that a modern woman can feed and raise children on her own, without the help of a man. Therefore, the basic instinct is freed from social layers, and the fair sex is attracted to the young and productive representatives of the stronger sex.

Myths about “unequal” marriage
The life of such a couple is under the close attention of others, and there are many who wish to do so who devote all their free time to discussing when this union will break up. Public opinion is much more loyal to married couples in which the husband is much older than the wife. Therefore, a woman who decides to throw in her lot with a young man will have to go through a lot of prejudices and abandon stereotypes before she stops paying attention to the age difference. Let’s try to understand the myths about “unequal” marriage that society imposes and understand that they have nothing to do with reality.

MYTH FIRST. Such a marriage is obviously of convenience.
If a man is a gigolo, this does not depend on age at all. Men of this type will not refuse to live at the expense of a woman until they are very old. And if a young man doesn’t have enough money to pay for dinner at an expensive restaurant, and he invites a woman to an ordinary inexpensive cafe, this does not make him a gigolo.

MYTH SECOND. The woman will become a “mom and nanny” for him.
With a husband of any age, a woman begins to play the role of nanny and housewife. In this case, most likely, everything will be just the opposite: the young man will try his best to prove that he is already an adult and knows a lot about everything.

MYTH THIRD. Sooner or later he will leave for a young girl.
A man can live in an ordinary marriage for twenty years, and then go to his daughter the same age. And there are many examples from life. No one can guarantee a long-term marriage. Therefore, it is better to simply live with your loved one without stupid prejudices.

MYTH FOUR. Marriage of peers is the most stable.
Statistics say the opposite: about 50% of marriages of the same age break up. The reason is the sexual incompatibility of the young couple. The young wife is not yet ready for her husband’s sexual activity and does not accept it. Therefore, families where the husband is 10 or more years younger than the wife do not suffer from such problems.

The advantages of such a marriage
Sexologists and psychologists argue that such “unequal” marriages have many chances for stability and longevity. The fact is that in such a marriage, the husband’s age encourages the woman to take extra care of her appearance, and besides, the young husband’s libido is at its best, which undoubtedly benefits both. On average, the peak of sexuality in women occurs at the age of 30-40, and the sexiest age for a man is 18-25 years. That is why often an adult woman who has gotten on her feet prefers a younger partner. From a sexual point of view, this is the most equal marriage, satisfying the needs of both men and women. A sexually intense life can only benefit a woman at any age, and for older ladies, sex with a beloved young man will help her stay beautiful and healthy longer. And the most important thing is that in an alliance with a mature woman, a man “matures” himself faster, gaining confidence and worldly wisdom. Young men who continue to live in marriage with their more mature wife demonstrated high professional and educational growth to sociologists, although in such families the wife’s leadership often remains.

How to save a relationship
There are special requirements for a woman's appearance. A young husband is a reason to constantly keep yourself in good shape and take care of your appearance. A woman must always be at her best in order to successfully compete with young girls, so she tries to maintain youth and presentability for as long as possible - after all, appearance is of great importance, no matter how strong the love. Under no circumstances should you put your partner in the position of a child, no matter how inexperienced he may be. You cannot surround a man with hyperprotection. A man at any age feels the need for leadership, so it is important to encourage leadership qualities, and not immaturity.

If a woman begins to put pressure on her partner with her authority and takes the reins of power into her own hands, then sooner or later the man will find a less demanding lover. You shouldn’t relax, because an “unequal” marriage has a greater chance of falling apart in the first three years of its existence. Look for the advantages of such a relationship in stable feelings, the absence of hysterics, accusations and suspicions. You shouldn’t be jealous of your partner just because he’s younger, and don’t be like twenty-year-old girls who are ready to cause a scandal at the slightest reason. You must remember that jealousy is the number one enemy of your relationship. And do not forget that age imposes an obligation to be wiser.

There is no need to tell a man about your fears; forget once and for all the phrase: “When you grow up, you will leave me.” There is no need to make a toy out of a man. If an adult woman reduces the whole meaning of marriage to the fact that she does not skimp on financial expenses and gifts for her young husband, and in return only expects sex, then the man will sooner or later get tired of it. Without trust, sincerity and understanding, no relationship will last long.

Examples of a happy “unequal” fight
Of course, happy “unequal” marriages exist! And there are many examples of this. Princess Elizaveta Petrovna was eighteen years older than her second husband. They lived happily for twenty years in a secret marriage. Balzac and Laura de Bernis, who was twenty-two years older, had been together for a long time. At the age of seventeen, Prophet Mohammed fell in love with forty-year-old Khadija, his first wife, and loved her for many years, even when he had numerous younger wives. Popular singer Claudia Shulzhenko was twelve and a half years older than her husband Georgy Epifanov. He carried this love throughout his life.

In a word, if a woman is older than a man, then such a couple is doomed to a happy future and the severity of disagreements at the same time, like any other couple. In fact, you shouldn't pay attention to age, because human years are just numbers. And age is judged by the state of one’s soul and way of life. Therefore, look for a person who will become a faithful and reliable support in life, will delight the soul and eye, and will be able to share one life between two. And let your age difference be large or small, or maybe it simply won’t exist, because the most important thing is love. And as you know, all ages are submissive to love! Where there is this bright feeling and desire to be together, there will be no reason for quarrels and separations.

Unequal marriage when the woman is older than the man

Unequal marriage when woman older than man. Often the reasons when a man chooses an older woman are different - maybe due to previous similar experience, and then mercantile interests. He may need another "mother" to take care of him. A woman in such a relationship has a clear idea of what she wants from this person. He could be an outlet for her feelings and life. If she wants to change her life: choose a new style of clothing, listen to different music, catch up with new trends - her young husband gives her a chance to do this.

And at the same time, despite the negative attitude towards them, the number of marriages in which the wife’s age is 10 or more years older than the age of her chosen one is growing every year. Thus, in Moscow, out of 60 thousand marriages concluded annually, about 5 thousand - 9% - are unions with an age difference of 7 or more years in favor of the bride. And just over a thousand registered unions are characterized by an age gap of 10 years or more. According to Moscow sociologists, five times more such unions are not registered and exist in the form of so-called. » civil » marriages.

It must be said that the number of such unions is constantly growing - by 0.2% per year! In large US cities, this figure has already reached 12% and continues to grow! Psychologists say that there is a fashion for marriages of different ages that is progressing: the main trend of this fashion is unions of forty-year-old men with young women, but forty-year-old women are also actively uniting with young people, albeit not 20 years old, but 25-30 years old.

Psychotherapists and sexologists, having discovered a sharp increase in marriages of older women with young men, enthusiastically began to study these young representatives of the stronger sex. Who are they? What makes them give up communication and sex with their young and pretty peers and enter into an alliance with a woman of 35 - 40 years old? What makes them go against literally their entire environment: friends, family, work colleagues? What makes you voluntarily turn yourself into an object of ridicule? These studies brought unusually interesting results, especially since they were carried out using the most modern methods: the so-called. “projective” tests, hypnotic immersion and “truth serum”. What do we know about young husbands of middle-aged wives?
For many young men, one of the most important (if not the most important!) factor in marrying a woman 10 or more years older than them is the so-called “unusual military school cadet syndrome” or, as Frank Pitman calls it, “syndrome non-standard cadet." This term was formed back in the 80s in relation to completely different men and different circumstances. In the early 1980s, American military psychologists discovered that about a fifth of cadets at American and British military schools were significantly different from everyone else. They, these young men, come from intelligent families, far from military interests, they graduated well from school or were already studying at a university. And suddenly, unexpectedly for everyone, despite the persuasion of their parents and friends, they enter a military school or volunteer for the army.

Deep psychological studies of such young men, including surveys in hypnotic immersion, conducted in the USA and Great Britain, showed: they vaguely feel impulses, desires to use alcohol, drugs, promiscuous sex life, and aimless pastime. Let me emphasize: these young people are not yet drunkards, or drug addicts, or revelers, or slackers, but they already feel that they can become one, that they are drawn to this. And to escape these internal impulses, they flee to the army, where discipline, uniform, the whole atmosphere of military life, they hope, will save them from “falling into the abyss.”

And to conclude this big topic, I would like to address couples where the partner is older:

1. Ignore public opinion. When a man is younger than a woman, this is a common occurrence in our time. Don't worry about how your friends and family will react. The main thing is that you love and are loved and it’s good for you to be together.

It is not surprising that young men are attracted to such ladies, and not to their peers. A woman at any age can only benefit from a sexually intense life, and for older ladies, sex with her beloved young man will help her stay beautiful and healthy longer.

An older man worries about erection and how his heart will withstand the volcano of passions in bed with a young girl. There are no such problems with young people. Even if nothing comes of an “unequal” relationship, a wise woman will treat it as a pleasant, bright adventure in her life.

Doomed love?

Of course, the simplest thing that comes to mind is: a man is looking for a mother in such a woman. And how convenient! She is already wise enough not to wear out the nerves of her other half with insatiable empty “hacks”. Moreover, for the most part, men who want to become successful in any field strive for such relationships. And, apparently, their calculation is based on the fact that there is no time for empty relationships, but they need a female partner.

2011-08-18 09:17:17

There are a few more points. His ex-wife was 4 years older. There is a child, 15 years old (my beloved had a very early marriage). After the divorce, my MCH lived with a girl 5 years younger than him. Now he says that it was a huge mistake, because he cheated on himself, he always liked older women. He is a very smart, reasonable, calm person. The greatest value in a relationship for him is respect, understanding, the ability to find compromises, and sound reasoning. And if there is also love, then there is no point in dreaming about more. This is all present in our relationship with him.
Elena, you are absolutely right that you need to be well-groomed. I will add that a woman should be well-groomed and take care of herself at any age. Now I can say that I look great. Even at 20 I was not the same as I am now. My former classmates don’t recognize me))) Well, let everything go as it goes, time will tell. In the meantime, we have a great time together!!!

2011-08-18 04:04:52

Lutik, in my opinion, your age difference is not so great, and then with age it will only disappear even more. I don't understand your fears.
(P.S. my husband is 4 years younger than me - the difference is smaller, of course, than yours, but the question of age never arises for us at all. And don’t bring it up. And then everything will be fine. Just don’t forget to keep an eye on yourself to always look younger than your age!))))

2011-08-17 17:07:05

lawina: belladonna writes: was. did not work out. the difference was 17 years. I've always been attracted to men older than me. I find it more interesting with them. Well, as Olcha wrote, Olyushkin writes: quote: intelligence, independence, experience, lack of stupidity did not work out because of the age difference. The man himself has been indecisive all his life, and when he started courting me, he didn’t calculate his strength, but in general, if you think about it in a purely practical way, then for me, 17 years of difference is still a bit much. but 7-12 years or so are the numbers that matter. although I don’t promise and am convinced that everything depends on the personal qualities of a particular man. Oh, just like mine! The biggest difference is 19 years. The man retreated first - he was afraid for his health and *what would his mother say* (his mother). My husband and I are 8 years apart, he is older. But he’s older only according to his passport.

Secret: So it turns out that all my long-term relationships are with younger men...with the first guy there was a difference of 2 years, we dated for 5 years...with my husband there was a difference of 2 years, we lived for five years, of which we were legally married for 3 years...now the difference is 5 years... .I was very afraid….there were doubts….but I’m expecting a child from him….we are establishing relationships…..the main desire is to understand each other and accept! But situations are different! And confused...you'll figure it out!

belladonna: lawina writes: Oh, just like mine! The biggest difference is 19 years. The man retreated first - he was afraid for his health and *what would his mother say* (his mother). a good boy, obedient :) but mine was simply afraid to change his life - the moment came when our hardship lasted almost 6 years and something had to be decided. and now I am left with nothing. and I kept worrying about what my mother would say - I was building all the bridges with her.

Often the “first time” for both men and women happens with a partner older, Sometimes much. This is easy to explain. Experienced people inspire trust with their knowledge and confidence. By the way, American sexologists, based on psychological tests and surveys of young girls, compiled a “portrait of an ideal deflorator.” This is by no means a timid 17-year-old boy. This is a man about 32 years old, experienced, independent, reserved and caring. He knows how to please a woman and belongs to the sexual-psychological “man-father” type.

At age 40, both sexes experience major physiological changes. However, they do not in the least prevent either one or the other from indulging in love pleasures. According to experts, menopause does not kill sexuality, but on the contrary, it can even enhance it. The woman becomes liberated, ceases to be afraid of pregnancy, and orgasm manifests itself more clearly than before.

But a quarter of the “ex-husbands” were characterized by a fairly high level of adaptation, much higher than before entering into marriage at different ages.

Although the condemnation of others was an important motive for the breakdown of the marriages we are talking about, the attitude of the immediate environment and work colleagues towards “ex-husbands” has not changed; A group of psychologists from Philadelphia, led by Michael Webb, who studied this issue (this city ranks first in the world in the number of marriages of different ages - towards women) found that even three to five years after the breakup of their union, discrimination against these young people did not stop. They were still considered infantile, not independent, in need of care, and these attitudes were manifested by those around them in many everyday actions. According to this researcher, any long marital union - three years or more - with a significantly older woman spoils both the psychological and business reputation of a young man for twenty years or more. Michael Webb advises young people to move to another city after the breakup of such a marriage: in this case, the experience gained in marriage will “work” for the client, and his reputation will not suffer - the new environment will know that he was married, but to com - will not know.

on the ability and skill of an older partner

gradually rebuild relationships, make them

more and more equal, partner, adults.

Technically, this is achieved very simply. After being together for six months or a year, one day tell your much younger partner the following: “You know, honey, at first I perceived you as just a child... And, it turns out, you can be quite an adult! Actually, you are already an adult... So, from now on, let’s build completely equal relationships. In our love, we must be equal to you in absolutely everything! Starting tomorrow we begin a new era!” You know how these words will make the heart of your young man or your girlfriend beat happily! With what grateful eyes they will look at you! And you will be respected even more and loved even more... Remember:

We always grow up exclusively outside of our

parental home, in communication with anyone other than their parents. Therefore, we always want to communicate with older people.

Second husband Audrey Hepburn became the Italian playboy and psychoanalyst Andrea Dotti - he was 9 years younger than her. Having gone through a divorce from Andrea, the actress spent the rest of her life with Robert Walders, who loved her dearly, who was seven years younger than Audrey.

TEXT: Vladimir Kulikov