If you married an American. Decided to marry an American

Every Russian has seen so many American films that sometimes this country can seem as familiar as Russia. Many people dream of moving to live in the USA, and girls dream of marrying an American. But films are one thing, but real life- completely different. What are they, real Americans? Americans appear to us mainly as rational and practical people who strive to be masters own life and in general this seems to be true. For American men, it is very important to have a fully equipped home and a prosperous family, so they work hard and strive to constantly increase their income level.

In the USA, it is not customary to ask parents for help, so if your American friend is well-off financially, then rest assured that he earned everything himself. They take marriage, as well as life in general, very seriously and do not get married until they get on their feet and start earning enough to start a family.

How to please an American

Americans treat women from other countries very well and willingly enter into interethnic marriages. This is a unique country, entirely composed of immigrants and their descendants of various nationalities. It doesn’t matter where a person came to the USA from or for what purpose - over time, all visitors become part of the free American culture.

The consequence of such a multinational flavor is complete tolerance for everything alien, foreign. Moreover, this applies not only to nationality or religion, but also to any beliefs and cultural characteristics. The right of any person to live as he sees fit is considered sacred and inviolable here. Americans are instilled with respect for other people's opinions from childhood.

Therefore, when you first meet, be it in person or on the Internet, your new friend will always agree with you and even assent. But you shouldn’t take it at face value and think that you’re finally lucky and have met a sensitive, understanding man. Politeness is here the real reason agreeing with someone else's point of view. Politeness and reluctance to accidentally offend, especially in the early stages of dating.

In communication, Americans value spontaneity, simplicity and a sense of humor. But here it is important to take into account that the humor accepted in the USA is significantly different from ours, therefore, if you do not understand a joke, then show politeness in return - laugh at it with your American friend.

The big plus is that your past doesn’t matter to them at all. An American will be interested in him not out of jealousy, but in order to better understand you today. In fact, he doesn’t care how many affairs you had before him, so you can safely tell how many husbands you had, whether you have children and other similar points, without fear of a negative assessment.

Interestingly, despite a somewhat rational and calm attitude towards women and life in general, there are many romantics among Americans who believe in happy family and true love with which they will be together until old age.

Americans in relationships

Another feature and great advantage of Americans is complete freedom in relationships. But not in the sense that they allow change, but in the lack of control and trust. He will never study your SMS or try to hack your account social network, and also check whether you have actually been where you say you are.

For them, love relationships are not only romantic feelings with intimacy, but also friendship. And true friendship is impossible without trust. Jealousy in the United States is not only not typical of most men, but is also considered a sign of bad upbringing. After all, if you or someone is jealous, then there is no trust, and if there is no trust, then there is no relationship.

Americans value free and emancipated women who do not strive to be a housewife and are able to combine life and profession. Directness, honesty and openness are highly respected here and are characteristic of almost all Americans, both women and men, even in sensitive matters. If you need to go to the toilet or feel sick to your stomach, then you can say so directly without fear of negative evaluation, even if this is the first date.

When it comes to money, American men are rational, but not stingy. Emancipation is voluntary, so they can pay for a woman in a restaurant and give her gifts without any problems. But they do this not from gentlemanly and patriarchal motives, but from liberal ones. A woman is completely perceived as an equal person, so he can pay, or you can - whoever and how is more convenient in a particular couple, because first of all you are friends.

The disadvantage is that at first it will be difficult to understand when an American friend does or says something to you out of politeness, and when - sincerely. But it’s a matter of time, gradually you will learn to understand such nuances of communication well.

Also, don’t be surprised if he doesn’t offer to pay for your flight to the USA for dating - this is not out of greed. It’s just that US citizens are accustomed to a high standard of living, and the cost of air tickets is not a serious expense for them and any working person can afford it. If this is a problem for you, it is better to say it directly, and not try to lead him to a solution with hints, as is often done in Russian couples.

American family

Often the expectations of Russian brides are not met. Even if your American fiancé is quite wealthy, it will not be possible to lead an easy and luxurious life, since they believe that they need to spend what they earn. Being a housewife who lives entirely at the expense of her husband will not work in the USA.
And again, this is not due to greed. In the USA, self-realization is of great importance to every person, which is called the famous expression “American Dream”. Therefore, if a woman sits at home and does not work, this means that she has psychological problems or she is simply not good for anything, that is, she is a loser. Yes, this term in the USA is used equally for both men and women.

It is more difficult for Russian women who do not have an American education to find work, so most likely you will be employed in the service sector or trade, or help your husband in his business. Moreover, in a position and salary, with official employment, since Americans greatly respect the very concept of law and strive to do everything “by the rules.”

Even if your husband is rich, you still won’t be able to sit idle, but you will have to take up the business that he will give you. The most important thing in this case is to draw up a marriage contract correctly, which is considered the norm in the USA, otherwise after a divorce you can be left with nothing, and even in a foreign country.
But, despite such importance of personal and professional fulfillment, Americans also find time for family. They are great fathers who would never go out for a beer with friends instead of spending time with their children and family, which is very important to them.

At the same time, they are completely independent in everyday matters - if his wife is sick or is late after work, he himself will prepare dinner for himself and the children, without considering this any special act. The same applies to cleaning and all household chores in general - in the USA they are not considered a typical female responsibility, so the one who has time for this cooks, washes and cleans. this moment.

From childhood, little Americans are taught to be independent and responsible, so it is not common for men to see their wife as a kind of “mommy” who will look after him. More like an equal partner and a reliable friend. Therefore, if you are independent and purposeful, and do not dream of sitting on your husband’s neck, but have your own goals in life, then an American husband will be an excellent choice for you.

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And so, girls, you have found your man, he is everything you need, you are happy and ready to marry an American. Not so fast. We always talk about differences in cultures, and in this case it is even greater. This makes it seem impossible that a young, confused and vulnerable chiquita from Eastern Europe would ever be able to hobble an American mustang. I won't lie, it's difficult. I can count on one hand the number of long-term marriages between Americans and Russian women. But there is hope and opportunity, which is provided by knowledge, information and understanding - we are ready to provide all this MINI to you :)

I don't believe in fate, I believe in preparation, arming myself with facts and not only creating your future, but defining it. Since I've opened my mouth, I thought I'd say some well-behaved shit just to be on the safe side. So ladies: first and most important, dating in the US means something completely different than it does in Eastern Europe. There you go on a few dates with the same guy, and boom - you're in a relationship. Now you have a boyfriend. Unfortunately, this is very different from dating in the land of dreams and hopes. As I said earlier, Americans are serial lovers. They have enough time and money to meet with different women. And they will do it. They want sex, but they will also look under every stone in search of ideal woman. So while you're getting ready to take things to the next level with your lovely American boyfriend, he tells his friends that he's dating a cute girl from Eastern Europe and will see where it goes. It doesn’t matter to him whether you slept or not, whether your nights together were the most magnificent or not, you still barely know each other and are figuring out whether a serious relationship awaits you in the future. Shocking, but it's a fact. What you need to take away from this is that you need to learn to move your relationship forward. After reading our stories, you already know a lot more about the American, and he understands you more. Although the task is difficult, the result is quite possible because your knowledge gives you an advantage over his knowledge. You know what he wants; he has no idea about your goals. Now you must align your expectations and resist the urge to get distracted by what's ahead. Understand that if you want to share your life with an American, it will take time and a certain strategy.

So, the strategy:

1) As we now know, Americans really want to please everyone, especially their women. First advantage: make it clear that you happy with him, but not entirely thrilled with his relationship planning. Say where you're from and how different your cultures are, but explain it by using his parents as an example of how Americans used to get married at a younger age. This will help you understand each other and push him a little.

2) Honesty- the best policy, in other words, try to share your feelings, and more importantly, your fears. Explain how hard it is to be all alone in new country, how special you feel being around someone like him. Say that you have no idea how you can survive alone in America, and no matter what happens between you, he had a big impact on your life, and you will never forget it. Not only will this please him like a stack of Russian pancakes, but more importantly, it will show him what a huge role he plays in your life. Such a challenge is within the capabilities of a real man, and this is the one you want to be with.

3) Over time, slowly begin to share your everyday problems. Start with financial and work difficulties, and evaluate his reaction. If you do it right and with the right amount of honesty, he will want to help. Try not to make it about the money, but rather the hope and security he provides by your side. Let him be your hero. The next step is your visa situation, and over time he will know more and more about it. Remember, Americans don't have visa problems, so they don't know anything about them. When he falls in love with you, let him know that he can also save you, both of you. Give him the information and let him decide, if it's love he'll do it right choice. But don’t press him, many girls immediately tell men that if they don’t think about marriage, then they cannot continue the relationship. This method guarantees the end of the affair. Applying such undue pressure, especially in the early stages of a relationship, will not only scare him away, but also make him angry because life situation forces him to make decisions that he should not make at the moment. Understand that Americans know absolutely nothing about visas. They rarely need it to travel, and when they need it, they quickly receive it from the government of the corresponding country. No matter how difficult it is for you, don't make your man feel responsible for your situation.

4) Conquer his mom. Americans are greatly influenced by their mothers, and in most cases, she is the most important person in his life. She wants the best for him, and in her opinion, no woman deserves her little boy. Therefore, getting her approval means finding an influential ally. She wants him to settle down, give her grandchildren, and with the right approach, you can prove that you are the perfect girl for him. Start by talking about your old values. She is sure that since her youth the world has changed a lot, and mostly for the worse. Tell us about yours family education, how they worried about you when you moved, and how glad they were when they learned that you met her son. Tell her that she reminds you a little of your mom and how much it means to you to spend time with her because you miss your family so much. Mothers always worry about their sons, so it is important to make it clear that you are also worried about him. If your boyfriend is very thin, tell his mom that you are trying to fatten him up, and how worried you are because he works so much and does not have time to eat properly. If your boyfriend is very big, tell your mom that you are constantly trying to cook more healthy food, and carefully monitor that he eats properly. Ask for recipes that you could prepare to help him eat healthier. Tell him that in your home country all the food is organic and natural, and you are trying your best to find the same products for him. Explain that you are worried because he works so much and does not have enough time for a proper lunch. If your boyfriend is fit and fit, congratulate her on how well she raised him and taught him to take good care of himself. Tell him that you also think it's important to eat healthy and have a balanced diet, and how impressed you are with how much he works out. Note here that while it's great to keep your body in shape, you hope he doesn't overdo it because he's not beautiful because of his looks. Now it's time to say: in your opinion, he works very hard, and then he also studies, and you hope that this is not too much work. What you achieve with these statements is very important. You will show mom how much you value your relationship with her little boy, you will make it clear that the things that are important to his mother are just as important to you, and most importantly, by constantly expressing your concern for his hard work, you will demonstrate your concern for his good well-being. Many mothers are afraid that their son has fallen into the trap of a gold digger, that is, one who is with a guy only for material things. Your desire for him to work less will show your mom that his well-being is more important to you than his wallet. Once this is achieved, it is very important to plan something for the future with his family. Show how family-oriented you are and let mom know you're the one. This way, she can put pressure on the guy, and you sit back and reap the benefits. Serious catch: Every guy's dad thinks he's a ladies' man. Most likely, he will flirt with you. Don't try to lure him to your side or encourage it. Trust me, Dad doesn't mean anything unless he's a widower. But you risk being caught by your mother, and you will lose all hope of making her your ally.

5) Him married friends with children: In a serious relationship, it's time to dim the lights of the club dance floor. You don't need any more competition in a club with a bunch of half naked women twerking. It's time to live your home life. Meet his friends' wives and girlfriends and do your best to become friends with them. Start going to barbecues and just gathering where there will also be children. Show how you get along with children and how fun it is to have them around. He won't understand, but you are subconsciously putting into him what he sees in his future, and adding yourself directly into this picture.

6) Work is his life: Americans live to work. For them, this is their greatest source of pride, their social existence, their purpose in life. In Eastern Europe, men go to work, come home and want to forget about it. You need to change your attitude here in America and try to be involved in your American boyfriend's work life. Ask him what exactly he does, what he likes about his work, what he doesn’t like, what he would like to change, what he wants to achieve in his work, what he wants to achieve, etc. As soon as you receive the information, write it down. Then read about his work on the Internet. Also find out how the economy affects it. The economy always has an impact on jobs, so watch the news, read on the Internet, discuss with other people, find out as much as you can about his work and the impact of the economy and recent events on it. Then most importantly, start talking to him. Start a little, expressing general ideas to show your interest. Start asking questions about his work, but with a little more competence. Give the impression of interest in his work, I guarantee he will respond. What this gives you: you once again imprint yourself in the picture of his future. Like I said, guys love sports and teamwork, so you're on his team. He begins to look at you no longer as the girl he sleeps with, but as his partner.

7) Colleagues and managers let's have a party: To create even more involvement in his career, you should support his communication with colleagues; even encouraging him to spend more time with them, and then being invited to some after-work fun. Calmly invite your colleagues to visit you and make joint plans with him. In the company of your boyfriend's executives, be his perfect complement. Look great, be friendly, talk a little about your personal life, about good things, of course. Praising your boyfriend as a person, not as an employee, will have a greater impact on your boss. Surprise him with your knowledge about the company, but try to ask smart questions rather than assert something. The boss will like your interest, and he and his colleagues will see that you are a perfect match for your American man.

8) Start pet: Whether you live together or not, it is important to create a "family unit." Short of having a baby, which would likely do more harm than good, a small puppy or kitten will quickly speed up the family unit situation and create a stronger bond between you. You will both be responsible for another life, and the picture you painted for your American man is now almost complete.

9) Walk shopping together: And if you think I'm talking about clothing stores, believe me, he'd rather go to the dentist to have a nerve removed than sit in the fitting room watching you put on yet another outfit you don't intend to buy. Men can buy a whole wardrobe in 2-3 hours, and God forbid you will choose a swimsuit during this time. Never rely so much on your relationship to take him out shopping for clothes. Buying food, furniture, or even a quick visit to the doctor will bring you closer together as a family. This isn't picnics and Sunday brunches, this is part of real life, the life you want to inspire him to live with you. When you've done this a few times, it's time to up the ante, as they say in the game of cards, that is, to push one last time to the altar. One afternoon when you're together but don't have anything special planned, tell him you'd like to go to the jewelry store to look for a watch because you're already thinking about a birthday or Christmas gift for him. If you feel uncomfortable, say that you are choosing a watch for your father. Make sure that this jewelry store sells and wedding rings. After you've looked at your watch, and try not to linger, because on any shopping trip men have the attention span of a goldfish, start looking at other jewelry. Look at the earrings, take them and ask him if he likes them, do the same with a couple more jewelry. This will disarm him while you prepare your attack. Move effortlessly toward engagement rings. Notice how beautiful they are, but terribly expensive. Mention that in your country diamonds are optional for weddings. And watch his reaction all the time. If he seems uncomfortable or bored, it's time to go and save this tactic for another time. If he plays along, ask if he thinks they will allow you to try on any rings. Thus, he already gives you the go-ahead. Try on a couple, choose the one with the smallest diamond, ask how it looks, but don’t make a fuss. After a couple of minutes, move on. Americans can't help but talk, so wait and see if he says anything. If there was no reaction and no reference to the future, it’s time to start a conversation.

10) At this point, you have exhausted all the tactics and achieved all the goals necessary to push your American man towards marriage. You have firmly established yourself in every area of ​​his life. You've shown your desire to be a part of his future, and it's time to talk about the same for you. The most important part of your conversation with him will be about seriousness of intentions. As we've already discussed, Americans aren't always happy about this; Older unmarried men often exhibit a fear of serious relationships. The best way to help him understand serious intentions is to start a conversation, explaining your serious attitude towards him. Tell me that once upon a time you decided to come to the USA, this is a very scary decision for a young girl. You also decided to stay in the USA, leaving behind everything and everyone you had ever known. Tell him that you have long decided to devote your life to him. When you first came to America, your life was a blank piece of paper waiting for your story. You decided to start new life and start your story with him. When you met him, you no longer looked for others. Then explain that he doesn't owe you anything for this, it's just who you are. Say that you would like to share life together, not today or tomorrow, but in your heart, you believe that it is time to begin this process. Don’t rush your American man with an immediate answer, although you hope for a positive one. Americans get irritated when pressured, and he may say the opposite of what he feels. And finally, whenever there is an answer, it is a beginning.

I hope these tips help you find happiness in America. Good luck and my best wishes to you!

What you need to know if you want to marry an American
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This article will be useful for girls and women who have decided to link their destiny with a US citizen. Many Russian and Ukrainian women want to marry an American. According to survey results, potential grooms from the United States are far ahead of men from near and far abroad countries.

The desire of our young ladies is quite understandable - America still leads in terms of living standards, wages are higher there, people live in their own houses, etc. But why do Americans give preference to our compatriots and Ukrainians, ignoring women from their own country? And what awaits the young lady who marries an American if she is lucky? The material published below will help answer these and other questions.

Dry statistics claim that more and more Americans are going to look for brides in Eastern Europe and Asia. The explanation is simple - American women attach great importance to their career and self-development. They are of little interest family values and home comfort. Men have to choose: either he begins to pull the “household burden” himself, taking on all the household chores, or he looks for a suitable woman for this. As a rule, the second option is preferable for them.

Women from Russia and Ukraine, unlike American women, gladly take all household chores into their own hands, leaving the man to worry about the material well-being of the family. In addition, American men look more substantial and respectable because, unlike ours, they first completely organize their lives (career, income, home, car, bank account), and achieve this in middle age (by the age of 40-50). And only then do they begin the search for the bride. In addition, it is almost impossible for an American to find a bride among his compatriots at this age, which is why the number of profiles of men from the United States on dating sites is growing.

What awaits a woman in America?

If you decide to marry an American, then read about what you will have to face when moving to America for permanent residence. First of all, you need to fill out a bunch of documents. Permission to officially move to the USA, documents for marriage, obtaining a green card and citizenship.
The so-called fiance visa is issued for 90 days. This visa gives you the opportunity to visit the groom, live with him, take a closer look at his living conditions, family and friends. And in case of mutual agreement, go through the marriage ceremony.

An application for such a visa can be processed within 4 months. In addition to the application, you will need to provide documents confirming your age and that the bride and groom are not married to other persons (what can you do, there are bureaucrats everywhere!)
The wait, of course, is quite long, but after a positive decision and marriage, you can immediately apply for a conditional green card, not only for yourself, but also for your children (if you already have them).

A quick positive response to such a visa accelerates the financial status of the potential groom. That is, the opportunity to support his wife and her children (existing or future) at his own expense.

After receiving a green card, a woman has the opportunity to work in the United States.

Advice: Those girls and women who decide to marry an American must be mentally prepared for the tedious procedure of obtaining this green card. You will have to collect a bunch of documents (much more than to obtain a visa!), undergo a medical examination (paid), attend many interviews where you will have to answer the most unexpected questions, even answering questions about what the topic of the conversation was at your first date. Therefore, listen carefully and remember all the details of your meetings with a man, ask him about his hobbies and interests. All this can come in handy during an interview. The purpose of the interview is to identify scammers who want to enter the United States through marriage.

A temporary green card is issued for only 2 years. And only after this period has passed, you can apply for a permanent one. Only with it in hand does it become possible to obtain American citizenship. By the way, a woman may be required to prove that she lives with her husband. So you need to have photographs that show a joint vacation, plane tickets, receipts for common purchases, etc. The more, the better. Because if there are not enough of them, they can invite mutual acquaintances, neighbors and friends to confirm. In general, it’s still a drag...

Citizenship can be obtained 2-3 years after the permanent green card is in hand.

So what's the end result?

Why all the trouble? Having married an American, a woman finds in him a caring husband who ensures the material well-being of the family. Several children are born without fail (one child in a family is rare). Children grow up in an atmosphere of almost permissiveness (which often affects their character). But upon reaching adulthood, they are obliged to begin an independent life (there are no options here). Parents help their children get an education if they so desire. But the children decide for themselves whether to continue their studies after school or go to work.

By the way, America celebrates a huge number of holidays. In addition to traditional birthdays, New Year) there are many more national ones. And all of them are celebrated with wide and plentiful feasts in the circle of relatives and friends. This is one of the features of American culture. The whole process is accompanied by sincere joy and fun.

How to meet an American

Everything is quite simple here. Americans themselves find future brides on dating sites. They are happy to enter into correspondence and voice dialogue with the girl they like.
After all, they are no less interested in dating and developing relationships than women. The only requirement is knowledge of English. And the deeper, the better. Few people start learning Russian for the sake of marriage... I advise you not to delay this if you have firmly decided to marry an American. I recommend the best English courses available today (this is).

And you can find trusted dating sites on and also in.

I wish everyone happiness!

Humor in conclusion:

"- Hello! Where are you going?

- Married...

- Congratulations! Why are there so few things?

“So I won’t be long…”

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So what is he like, an American husband? What it's like: marry an American and live in the USA? For those women who want marry an American, it’s useful to know about them national characteristics. I want to talk a little about my opinion about them.

Of course, it is very difficult to create an accurate portrait of all American men. Firstly, because America is a multinational country. And secondly, I didn’t communicate with everyone, I know my husband, his friends, I can appreciate some of their actions, I once helped with surveys of men on international dating sites, and I also watch American news.

Today, marrying an American will no longer surprise anyone. And only the lazy did not talk about the negative experience of Russian brides in the press and on television. I can also say that our press and television do not give a complete picture of Americans in general and their men in particular. While reading this article, I ask you to take into account that here, as elsewhere, all people are very different, but several traits that are most often found in American men can be identified...

1. Firstly, men value family ties. The employee and friend who has a family and children enjoys great respect. For example, my husband says that at work they all have photographs of their wives and children: at the workplace; in the changing cabin; in a truck (best man), etc. They brag about the successes of their children and wives openly and without embarrassment. At meetings/acquaintances, all my husband’s friends showed me photographs of their loved ones on their phones and were very happy when I said: “He (She) looks very good” or “They are beautiful.”

Because of this, it is difficult to “divide” children during a divorce; men, just like women, fight for custody of their children.

But men also love to help their wives with housework, and often responsibilities are distributed truly equally. Maybe this is due to the fact that there is more here, everything is mechanized: dishwashers, automatic vacuum cleaners, bread (meat, sausage...) slicers and openers, and cooking does not take as much time as in Russia?!! But I am inclined to believe that this is their mentality, their concern for the home. They know how to do everything and are always ready to help with housework.

2. If you married an American, then you will have to come to terms with the fact that they work hard, often they like their work! What to hide, most often Russian women and girls can count on marriage with Americans of average income. The rich live in a different environment, and people of low income simply cannot afford to pay the fees and relocation of the Russian bride (unless, of course, you decide to pay for everything yourself - which I categorically do not recommend!). But in order to support yourself and your family at the level of average income, you need to work and sometimes work a lot.

3. Americans, and not just men, everyone, love lawyers very much! Not in the sense of paying them for every sneeze, but rather using their services, even then (in my opinion) when you can do everything yourself. Example: when my husband (still fiancé at the time) was applying for a K1 visa for me, he hired a lawyer, in 2010 it cost him $1,200. I count a lot of money for filling out those papers.

Therefore, I have taken complete control over the collection of documents and filling out forms for various status changes here in America... Well, they love and trust lawyers, here so many things can be solved by resorting to their services that some do not hesitate to go to law firms.

So, you have made the decision to marry an American

what kind of people are these Americans read? Now you can and should go through the pages of this site and read, for example, an article or.

And also, I want to write about the fact that American women are too passionate about feminism, too independent, and sometimes selfish. They are not accustomed to housekeeping, they do not know how to save money and create comfort out of nothing like we do.

Also, after listening to stories from American men about their divorces, you understand why they look for wives in the territory former Union. Many, after divorcing their American wife and hearing a story about the domesticity, tenderness, beauty and ingenuity of Russian women, go to dating sites. So let’s not disappoint them and let’s also go get acquainted….

The story of Ksenia from Siberia is worthy of a multi-season series. A failed marriage at home and a new one love story in the USA - from her own experience, the girl shows her compatriots that if you are not afraid of difficulties and boldly go towards your goal, then in everyone’s life there will definitely be a meeting with a prince and a happy ending. An SHE correspondent spoke with the blogger.

Ksenia's past

In Novosibirsk, the girl was a real estate agent and never dreamed of moving to the States. But it so happened that, having studied to become a process engineer, Ksenia did not even have time to work in her specialty, since she moved to the USA at the age of 22. The American life of a Siberian woman began with a simple visit to a friend.

Immigration

The most difficult thing for Ksenia during the emigration process was overcoming her fear.

« We don’t take any steps simply because we are afraid, we don’t have enough information. Sometimes you gave up, but you couldn’t relax, because in America you have to pay for everything. For the apartment, for gas, for electricity, taxes. I had to act all the time».

Russian and American men

The girl notices that Russian and American men have significant differences in mentality. Americans know how to treat a woman as the fair sex, to love unselfishly, without expecting in return that his lady will happily start washing socks and ironing shirts. But Russian men expect exactly this from a woman. There is a strong stereotype in the minds of Russians that a woman must bear the burden of work, life, children, and sometimes even her husband. Americans prefer to let hired workers do housework. If opportunities do not allow using the services of a housekeeper, then an American man, even in this case, will not put all the housework on fragile female shoulders.

Career in New York

Ksenia decided to study as a psychologist in New York. Many dissuaded her, arguing that it was very difficult, she needed to master it perfectly. English language. But the stubborn Siberian woman made her conscious choice and did not regret it. After all, this was the first step towards starting my own business. First there was work in a clinic, then practice in a hospital, and I even had to work with alcohol-dependent patients. At the same time, Ksenia kept her blog, conducted consultations, and over time noticed that her fledgling private practice was bearing fruit. The girl charges $90 for a personal consultation.

« Half of my clients are girls from Russia, mostly Moscow, the other half are people living in New York and America. The main request is relationships, the second most popular is the purpose and realization of oneself in a career».

Family

Ksenia says that she always dreamed of exactly the kind of family she found in the States. Here the girl does not have the feeling that she owes anything to anyone, her husband never burdens her homework. Ksenia is also very impressed by the high level of organization of her American husband. The couple always plans their vacation in advance; the husband took out insurance just in case, so that Ksenia and the child would not need anything if something happened. And unlike many Russian girls, our heroine has nothing against marriage contracts.

Changes in Novosibirsk

Ksenia was not in hometown for five whole years, but during such an impressive period the girl did not notice virtually any significant changes.

« I love Novosibirsk, and for me it will remain my hometown, but in contrast with America, the grayness and some kind of internal discontent catches my eye - this has always been the case, I just started to notice it now. There are not enough smiles, as there are enough of them in the USA».

Loneliness and depression

New York is a city of careerists. But while constantly earning money, people don’t notice how they are becoming more and more lonely. Americans are famous for their smiles, but few people know that behind their dazzling smiles lies despondency and depressive state. Ksenia, as a psychologist, knows this firsthand, because sometimes people just need to speak out and be heard. In Russia, the help of a psychologist is not as widely used as in America. Russian women usually go to a friend with a bottle of wine, and some even like to turn to alternative medicine and pseudo-psychics for help.

Ksenia advises women who dream of a successful, cloudless life:

« We need to develop and not stand still. The biggest mistake women make is that they expect that same male magician to come and make their life a fairy tale. You need to constantly invest in yourself and your development - and then the right man will appear himself».

Russian and American fashion

The contrast between Russian women and American women is immediately striking. In America, they prefer simple and comfortable clothes, while in Russia women are able to put on makeup for several hours just to take out the trash. Even immigrant women in America are immediately visible in the crowd by their well-groomed and elegant appearance. According to Ksenia, if you want to find an American man, then it is better to do this in the outback; in New York there are many Russian immigrants who please the eyes of Americans, but in a small town you can play in contrast with the locals.

A large number of girls and women ask for advice on how to marry a foreigner. The very first thing Ksenia advises them is to treat the search for a future spouse as their job.

You can register on a dating site, as I did Native sister heroines. But you need to be very careful not to run into Internet perverts. Fill out the form carefully; you shouldn’t flaunt all your charms and talents - Americans like things to be a little simpler. Be kind, sincere and open.

Don’t be afraid to take the initiative, because there is nothing shameful in being the first to start a dialogue.

« Before going on a date, it’s better to call on Skype, see if his manner of behavior/talk repels you, and only after that can you make an appointment. My sister, for example, went on dates for 4 months, during which time she had 3 official proposals for marriage - good, wealthy men. Then she could not choose from two men - a psychologist and a policeman, in the end she chose the man who communicated better with her child, it was a policeman. Now they are preparing for the wedding».