Virtual love - cheating or innocent infatuation

The more time we spend in the virtual space, the more real it begins to seem. In this world, there is no morality as such, the norms of behavior in society can be safely stepped over, hiding under the mask of anonymity.

Why is virtual space so attractive?

Man is designed in such a way that he needs to constantly improve himself. If someone considers that he has reached the desired level of development and stops there, then he will degrade, and will not freeze in the current state.

But moving forward and developing a person as a person requires not only time, but also significant efforts. In addition, you want to immediately see the result and note your progress.

To say, not to be

There is a temptation to take a shortcut: not to become, but to seem better. On the Internet, you can be anyone. Why go to the gym and limit yourself to food when you can find a pretty photo and pass it off as your own? You do not need to take care of yourself, in the virtual world they will not notice that you have not brushed your teeth for 3 days.

And although it may seem that it helps to become better in life, to achieve good results, in fact it is not so at all. This is a fast track to the abyss of frustration and self-destruction.

Communication by mood

It is easier to communicate with virtual interlocutors. A bad mood or irritation after a hard day will not be noticeable in intonation or sharp words. When the conversation is in writing, there is time to think about your words. And the fact that the other person does not see us in a vulnerable state gives a sense of security and soothes.

If you are not in the mood to communicate, you will not have to listen to discontent live. You always have an escape route. And you don’t have to worry about the feelings and emotions of the interlocutor, unless, of course, you communicate in the real world.

Communication without obligation

Attractive virtual communication and the fact that it almost never has consequences. You can simply delete your page on the social network and create a new one, leave old friends perplexed in the past.

Virtual love is also safe from the point of view of contraception: sexual diseases are not transmitted over the Internet and the risk of unwanted pregnancy is zero.

Anonymity

Anonymity also protects from condemnation and public censure. If any desires or preferences seem shameful to you, you will almost certainly find like-minded people on the net.

Imaginary freedom

You can invent for yourself any person, give her a name, character, habits, preferences. This fictional person will quickly make friends, he will lead a more interesting life, have virtual sex. Most likely, he will do what you yourself would like to do, but for some reason it does not work out for you. This is a very dangerous path from the point of view of psychology. So deeply immersed in the image of another character, a person risks losing himself.

Virtual cheating - what is it all about?

Everything described above creates the illusion of impunity. Maybe virtual treason and not treason at all? Everything is possible on the Internet. Even what is prohibited by law. You just need to find a way to get to the closed sites. There is no need to be a genius programmer to bypass standard locks.

And pop-up ads often urge us to break the rules of morality, let our desires happen and have virtual sex. Skillfully composed texts muffle the voice of conscience and reason. Therefore, it seems that everything is fine, as it should be.

Communication with other women attracts men. If in real life you need to spend money on your mistress: go to restaurants, buy flowers and gifts for her, pay for a taxi, then it is much easier to start a conversation on the Internet.

Moreover, most people are very shy, they hardly make new acquaintances. What can we say about using hints to understand whether a woman is ready to become a mistress. Therefore, virtual love can be more economical for the family budget.

And in the network, this obstacle is easily eliminated. Rejection is no longer perceived so sharply. Yes, and there are a million contenders, there is always someone to choose from.

As in life, virtual relationships begin innocently enough. We got to know each other and started talking about our interests. And it begins to seem that you are like-minded people, no one understands you like an unknown interlocutor. And you get support from him (only in words), attention, sympathy.

And your mind creates an image of a real person, endowing him with only positive qualities. How can you not get carried away?

And at the first opportunity, your husband checks messages, writes something furtively, put multi-level passwords on his phone, computer. And you can feel it moving away. When you ask about who he communicates with and about what, he avoids answering, accusing you of encroaching on his personal space.

Communication smoothly flows into a more intimate channel. And now your husband is excited not by you, but by an outside woman. She differs from a real mistress in that your husband did not have sexual relations with her. But they could well have exchanged personal photos.

What kind of beast is "virtual sex"?

Virtual sex is a process of obtaining sexual satisfaction without the direct participation of a partner, but he is in touch: either he writes messages, or he talks on the phone or on a webcam.

Messages

A man can engage in self-satisfaction, just by texting with a virtual mistress. By the way, it can be quite real, just this time they diversified the format of their meetings.

They exchange intimate information, simulating sexual intercourse. Virtual love seems like a real passion, but off the Internet, these people would hardly be nice to each other.

phone sex

This is not the latest invention in the sex industry, but the development of communications and the Internet has made it easier and more accessible. Even if the service is provided on a paid basis, the wife may not suspect anything.

In fact, this is sexual communication with the help of voice. The dialogue is structured as if two lovers are having sex at the moment.

Video conference

This is a more progressive form of communication after the voice. The interlocutor can not only be heard, but also seen in all details. There are many paid sites where girls are willing to help a man achieve an orgasm and show themselves from any side.

What is common between real and virtual infidelity?

This type of betrayal is united by the fact that your man during the act of self-satisfaction does not think about you. Thoughts are not about you that delight him, you do not make his heart beat faster. Such virtual love can be disgusting and humiliating for the wife. But what to do?

First, find out the reasons that pushed your husband into another world. Maybe he wants variety, but does not want to change? Or is he ashamed of his desires? Or does he want to be a fit and athletic alpha male, rather than the average beer belly man?

When you get to the bottom of it, you can figure out how to bring your husband back to the real world. He may need the help of a psychotherapist. First of all, he is pushed into the virtual world by his own fears and complexes.

Is it worth it to forgive virtual treason

If you think that virtual sex is not sex at all, and you will eliminate the reasons for this behavior of your husband, then forgive him. We always strive for something new and unknown, but we do not always do it in the right way.

But if it’s unbearably disgusting for you to look at your husband, then evaluate what is more important for you: to preserve and revive the good that was between you or to destroy this relationship to the ground and create your family anew with another person? At this point, do not think about the children or what your relatives will say. Living with a person to whom you feel disgust is terrible. Moreover, your children will suffer more from this.

If the family is more expensive, then forgive and forget. Create a trusting relationship at home, do not scold or judge. Give your man the support he needs. Let him feel that he has a reliable rear.

What if it repeats

So you seem to have figured out the reasons, understood and forgave your husband, but he still spends more time on dubious sites than with you. And again virtual betrayal! What's the matter?

The fact is that such leisure is addictive. Usually one conversation does not stop forever. Depriving the virtual world, a man feels emptiness. She scares him.

Therefore, it is very important to prevent its occurrence. You must take on the task of preventing your husband from getting online again. Therefore, we replace virtual communication with live ones. Meet friends more often, go to visit.

Think of new hobbies. Now there are many different master classes. Do you want to cook sushi or pizza, practice calligraphy or learn how to paint with watercolors? Sign up soon!

Don't forget to walk together more often. Fresh air is good for health, and observing wildlife is calming and soothing.

Diversify your leisure time. Go to exhibitions and theaters, arrange dates in cafes. Go in for sports: run together in the mornings in the summer, and go skiing on the winter weekends.

You can invite your friends to share your new hobbies. More fun together!

Enact strict rules and regulations regarding technical devices:

• in the bedroom there is no place for a telephone and a computer;
• when we eat at the same table, all TVs, computers, phones are turned off or put aside;
• while going to the toilet or shower, the phone remains in the place allotted for it;
• no one under any circumstances has the right to take his phone without permission;
• we need a phone and a computer for work, for communication, devote more time to personal meetings.

Gradually, your husband will return to the real world, because he is so interesting. But since you know that he has such a tendency to withdraw into himself in a safe place, then you are armed. At the first sign of a renewed virtual life, you will quickly take action to get your husband back.

And reconsider your views on sexual experiments. Maybe you yourself will like it. Don't be a prude in the bedroom. Or maybe your husband himself will be disappointed in his fantasies. After all, in the imagination everything is different than in life.