Green door. Social adaptation of parents

At the Green Door early socialization center, even babies learn to communicate and respect other people.

The Green Door is easy to find. It can be opened like any other door, and you can enter the world where little people live. Here they communicate, play, study and live according to the laws of their small society. These laws are almost the same as in our big world.

Every parent is familiar with the problem of kindergarten, when a child, accustomed to being only with his mother, who will always protect and help, suddenly finds himself among strangers. The kid does not understand why his mother gives him to unfamiliar aunts, why he has to share toys with other children. He begins to make scandals in the morning, beat his colleagues in the garden, and more often get sick. Even babies are brought to the Green Door - the sooner the baby realizes that there are other people in the world besides him, and gets used to independence, the easier it will be for him to adapt to the new environment in the future.

The Green Door Center for Early Socialization appeared in Moscow in 1995. It is based on the example of the Green (or Open) home of the French pediatrician and psychoanalyst Françoise Dolto in Paris (opened in 1979). For twenty-five years, such houses have appeared in Switzerland, Belgium, Canada and other countries. They are small models of a society in which children learn to live from a very early age.

Anyone can come to the Green Door - admission is free. But there are strict rules: only children under 4 years old with their parents are accepted here (this is a very strict law that everyone is warned about - so you shouldn't be offended later). New "residents" are met by the host - psychologists, teachers, pediatricians - they do not serve and do not entertain (children and parents find their own activities), but explain the rules of behavior in the center and, if necessary, listen to the child or adult, help to understand each other ... The living space of the "Green Door" is divided into zones: a playground for noisy games (riding on typewriters), for quiet ones (blocks on the shelves, constructors, bingo), a place for playing with water (a large bath with a fountain, into which children climb, wearing aprons and rubber boots). On the contrary, there is a podium for the little ones. From here, babies are watching what is happening in the hall. What is important - the podium does not allow looking at them from top to bottom, so that the dignity of babies is not diminished in the least. There is a kitchen in the second hall. Here, the mother herself can warm the child's food and feed him. There are crockery, small tables and high chairs for babies.

Each mother or nanny who visits the Green Door has her own method of upbringing: some believe that it is in no way possible to say no to a child, others hardly let go of the baby, fearing that he will get hurt or scared. Here, everyone has the right to their point of view - both parents and employees of the Center, and children. And each learns to understand and accept the other as he is.

Goals. Tasks. Value

1. Early socialization of children

The stay of the child with his parents in the Green Door, prior to the child's admission to a nursery or kindergarten, ensures his painless adaptation to a kindergarten due to the child's gradual separation from the family, a separation that occurs at the pace that the child needs. The Green Door also creates favorable conditions for the development of the child's communication skills.

2. Social adaptation of parents

"Green Door" allows parents to feel their parental role, because they are present in the Center in this role. They get to use their time
stay at the Center to communicate with your own child and with other children, to observe the relationships between other children and parents and to think about relationships with their children and in their family as a whole. The "Green Door" helps to overcome the traumatic isolation of young mothers, promotes the development of contacts between families from different social strata and national cultures, the integration of disabled children and healthy children.

3. Prevention of psychosomatic diseases

The work of the "Green Door" is aimed at preventing childhood neuroses associated with the processes of separation and maladjustment to a preschool institution, as well as other psychosomatic diseases that arise against the background of unresolved family problems.

The psychological environment created in the "Green Door" also makes it possible to stimulate the development of children with delayed speech, mental, motor development, organic damage to the central nervous system and other disorders. Here they help children and their parents to believe in the healthy forces of the child, his potential
opportunities.

In the "Green Door" everything is subordinated to the development of the child's personality: the organization of the internal space, the rules, the observance of which is strictly for everyone - both children, parents, and staff, an atmosphere of communication that provides emotional
security and independence of the individual, regardless of age and individual characteristics.

"Green Door" is not a consultation where parents receive from specialists a direct, quite definite answer to difficult parenting questions, where they are advised how to resolve a difficult family situation or correct difficult relationships with
child. Specialists only help parents to better understand their children and their problems. The Green Door allows parents to find their own answers to these questions, to find a way out of the family dead end.

This permission is due to the respect of employees both for the personality of the child and for the personality of the mother and their use of such a means of preventing mental trauma as a word - a free safe word that frees from internal conflict fraught with mental trauma.

The Green Door allows a family to relate to themselves and to the world with great trust, to value themselves, their family and the human community in which they will live.

Staff

Children and parents in the "Green Door" are received by an interdisciplinary team of specialists, which includes: psychologists (age and medical), teachers (preschool, defectologists, social educators), doctors (pediatricians and psychotherapists), physiologists (age), social workers. These are the very specialists whose purpose is to preserve the mental and physical health of children, and their social adaptation. But not just specialists, but those who have been trained as a trainee of the "Green Door" and mastered the peculiarities of the "receiving" job. Of particular importance to employees
Green Door is familiar with the basics of child psychoanalysis. All employees, without exception, participate in a weekly seminar on the study of the concept of the Green House by F. Dolto and the basics of psychoanalysis.

Every day three people work in the Green Door, representatives of various professions in the field of childhood, people of different ages and, if possible, different genders. This so-called team works only once a week, giving way to their colleagues - the next three - in the Green Door. This organization of work provides children and parents with communication with different specialists and the selection of those who are more in line with their characters.

Personnel training for work in the Green Door consists of two parts: theoretical and practical. The theoretical part includes participation in a permanent seminar "Early socialization: theory and practice." Practical - participation in communication trainings, personal growth, which allow you to acquire the skills of dialogue, empathic active listening, teamwork, etc., as well as work, along with the main staff, with children and parents attending the Green Door. The duration of the internship is 6 months.

Organization of space, rules "Green Door" is a specially organized spatial and psychological environment.

The "Green Door" space is an open (for the child's view) room with several functional areas: a locker room, a quiet play area, a noisy play area and a ride on wheeled toys. The so-called wall is also located here.
separations with holes, a slide and ladders, a podium for "sliders" - children who cannot yet walk, a "dining room" - a place where children can eat what their parents took with them, a place to play with water, "street" or a path that connects all these zones.

This organization of space structures the child's life. So, for example, the wall separating the slide and ladders from the common space is involuntarily associated with prohibition, separation, border, the need to find an entrance or exit and symbolizes for the child
the difficulties and obstacles that he will have to face when
entering the world. It also signifies his future separation from his parents. This is the most serious of the boundaries, which should put an end to his initially inextricable bond with his parents and give him the opportunity to enter the world as an independent person.

The allocation of a special podium for the smallest does not allow looking down at them. The baby lying on the podium is with his older companion at the level of his eyes.

Play equipment is selected taking into account the holistic process of child development: toys that ensure the development of the motor sphere, sensory development, intellectual development, the ability to interact, etc., toys that allow you to get rid of aggression, relieve tension (when playing with water), get to know the environment the world and its laws. The center has children's books, selected with the participation of the methodologists of the Children's Republican Library, books and magazines for children and their parents on pedagogical, psychological and medical topics, etc.

The Green Door is also a place for a child to comprehend the rules of life, and they are strictly observed here. They exist for everyone and serve everyone. They provide basic safety for children. The rule does not demean. If it is for everyone, it is - on the contrary - the guarantor of equality. Clear rules for accepting constraints without stress serve to prevent neuroses.

Thus, the child is not allowed to cross the boundaries of the zone for outdoor games on wheeled toys. By observing it, he will not inadvertently harm others. In the "Green Door" of the child
warn that for games with water, for which a certain place is also allocated, he must wear waterproof aprons. As you know, water symbolizes motherhood, and an apron in this case is a barrier separating the mother's body from the child's body, which helps the baby to realize his separateness, his own individuality.

Building space correlates with the child's acquisition of speaking skills. The Green Door is a place of words. But in order for a child to become the subject of his own word, adults need to learn to listen and understand his language, and not only the language of his words, but also the language of his body.

Parents and children about the Green Door

For more than ten years of operation of the Green Door, thousands of children and parents have visited it, and not only residents of nearby areas. Kids often come here not only with their mothers, but also with the whole family, with their dad, with their grandparents. That more and more children
and parents open the "Green Door" - an unconditional evidence that this form of family support and prevention of mental, physical and social deviations is needed by people. Most importantly, children need it. One of them, when his mother invited him to get ready for home, said: “I don’t want to leave. This place is for me. "

From the logbook:

"Finally, our children have received the natural attention of adults."

"It's just wonderful here, you can do whatever you want. Thank you for such smart toys, for your care and comfort."

"My daughter was completely uncommunicative, she was afraid of other children. But here the opposite happened."

"We are here again. My son only says that about the Green Door. For me, these trips are a celebration of the soul."

"We are very glad that there is such a place. Children need it. It would be great if there was such a center in every district."

"An hour and a half to get to this" childhood center "is worth it.

"A huge request to everyone on whom its execution depends: each district (district) for such a room.

Our story today is dedicated to the Green Door project - the Russian incarnation of the Green House by Françoise Dolto, a French woman educator of the early 20th century. This institution is designed to prepare children for kindergarten, where they will have to stay alone in the new team. And here - everything is the same, but only mom is always there! At the same time, she can sit in another room and drink tea or read, but cannot go anywhere. And when a child, in the heat of the game, suddenly notices that his mother is not near him, he must find her somewhere nearby. This is the first immutable rule.

In the Green Door, children get their first social experience. No registration is required from you - employees simply write on the board the name and age of the child, as well as information about who he came with (mom, dad, grandmother). The composition of the participants is constantly changing, some leave, others come. Employees tell each newbie the basic rules, and then - complete freedom! Employees are not allowed to touch the child unless absolutely necessary, because this is an encroachment on his personality, on his personal freedom (according to Dolto, even if a child climbed somewhere and fell, this is his personal choice).

In the "Door" children are taught to observe certain social norms - to eat in a specially designated place, and not to run around with food; do not ride a bicycle on a pedestrian path; put on a special raincoat and galoshes when playing with water. Children learn to resolve conflicts themselves. There are no prohibitions here, except for the pre-established rules.

The premise consists of two rooms of different sizes. The first, large room is for outdoor games. True, there is a small nook for studying at the table, where felt-tip pens, pencils and educational games are laid out. And the rest of the space is a spacious place where you can frolic, climb, jump. There is a wooden wall with windows, a plastic house, and all kinds of sports equipment for kids, with which a variety of manipulations are permissible. There is a low podium with a slide and a "pool" - a hole with a pillow at the bottom, where kids happily "dive". Opposite is a fountain. This water play area is separated from the rest of the room by a low barrier and is tiled with ceramic tiles. Cloaks hang on carnations, and galoshes are nearby. For water games, the kid must wear this "uniform". The fountain has buckets, plastic boxes and other useful tools.

The second room is smaller and is designed for younger children. On the floor there are two large mats, where very tiny babies can crawl. There are shelves with toys along the walls. Toys are very different - from rattles to the railroad, from plush bunnies to "Lego".

In the corner is the kitchen-dining room. There is a microwave oven and an electric kettle. There are chairs for both adults and children of different ages.

The walls are lined with comfortable sofas and armchairs for parents. Here you can read and chat with other parents. A toilet is provided: separately for parents, separately for children.

The Green Door is a formally free establishment. There is a piggy bank at the entrance, where parents put as much as they can and as much as they see fit. The staff is different every day. But, as you already understood, he only explains the rules to beginners and monitors their observance.

The Green Door is designed for children from 0 to 4 years old. Mostly there are children from one to three years old.

Old address:
Podsosensky Lane, 26.
(Metro station "Kurskaya").
Works from 12 to 18 hours,
except Sunday.

New address:
Moscow, Fergana st., 13, building 1, entrance 1,
code 1 # 167

open on Wednesdays and Thursdays from 10 am to 2 pm,
on Sunday from 3 pm to 7 pm.

Mothers' comments on the Green Door,
collected in Internet conferences on the server nanya.ru

Masha:
Were today. Liked. Getting there, however, was hard on foot. I was even more convinced that it was better to drive in a heap. It's great to communicate there, otherwise everyone already knows each other and is more fun together. It took us 2 hours for the first time. A sea of \u200b\u200btoys. Children are strangers. Tired. But great! You can't create such a thing at home and you can't talk to kids.

There is a kitchen, there is a fountain, there is a playroom, everything is like not here (in the best sense of the word). Eh, it's a pity there is no bedroom to relax ...

We came a second time. Conclusions are different. Nastya already knew this place and calmly walked on her own. I sat talking with another mother. My daughter was running around somewhere, periodically coming to me.

It was then that I wanted to break one of the first rules - "Mom doesn't go anywhere." Yes, it's great to have mom next to me. But if you could walk away for at least 15 - 30 minutes, for example, to a bun stall, it would be so great.

And it seemed to me that the women who looked after the Green Door were not educators, but observers. He does not sit with the kids, don’t put on shoes that they have lost on the go, don’t straighten clothes and don’t discourage the kid from dragging an open felt-tip pen into his mouth. They are simply there. And the second time I already wanted to study with us.

They would be given classes, and mothers - theirs. Adults are already interested in something to participate.

There are no sports equipment, no classes, it is more difficult for older children to occupy themselves without a script.

The generosity of the toys was beginning to annoy too. Nastyukha stopped concentrating on the bunny or the little train, and began to overuse them carelessly, toss them away and toss them.

The indisputable advantage of this institution for us is that the child is among new people. Even if he does not communicate, he rotates in a different microbial sphere, gains immunity.

Another big plus in the Door is the lack of certificates. Because they must be collected in the garden, which, as you know, is tiresome.

We will come there again. We will ride until my daughter, in my opinion, grows out of her. I think much earlier than the indicated 4 years.

It's interesting and great to go there once. But then all sorts of thoughts climb. That the educators politely greet and see off near the charity piggy bank, make sure that the toys are not taken with them. Toys, great. As if someone had nowhere to put them, the baby grew up, so they gave them here. In any case, parents will not save up so much, because some toys clog others (why, for example, 3 bears or 4 trains, or more soft toys than useful educational ones). That brought criticism, right?

Marina:
The fact is that this is not a kindergarten, and not a developmental group. This institution was created to teach children and parents to communicate (maybe even more parents than children). Do instructors not tell children "no" (except three "no", which are warned in advance)? All conflicts are tried to be resolved by providing alternatives. Let's at least take the opportunity not to prohibit anything (if this fails in our own apartment).

All toys are good, and very diverse - both educational and sports - for all occasions. Everything is provided for feeding the child (and the parent), and for the toilet, very clean, comfortable. It’s even surprising that actually a "free" establishment has all this!

There is a lot to learn in the "Door" and in communication. It is very interesting to hear how the instructors resolve conflicts between children. For example, how will you react if an older child offends yours? Or did both want the same toy?

Masha:
I am in no way criticizing this wonderful establishment, where everything is at the European level.

There are programs that allow you to learn how to communicate with complete strangers through a couple of games. What's going on here? Everyone is on their own. Is this communication? It locates with each other. There is no script, you come and go and that's it.

There are also many entries in the guestbook: there is not enough sports complex for grown-up kids: a trampoline, a swing, a trapeze. Games with toys only.

And no one will help to learn to communicate with your child in a few hours, especially in silence.

I don’t think that monsters come there who only say “no” at home.

Zhenya:
We had enough sports equipment, because, in principle, even the house becomes an excellent arena for jumping and climbing (another mother and four kids and I climbed through windows and doors for half an hour and climbed out through the "walls" - 1,2,3 people each). The hosts are already busy with their "direct" responsibilities. But no one bothers you to organize what you see fit. And to communicate in conditions "as close as possible to combat" (ie, to real relatives) can be in the nearest sandbox.

Anya:
Today we were with my daughter (7 months) in the Green Door.

It's kind of boring. True, there are a lot of toys, and the child was happy to play with them, but there was no one of our age, everyone was big ... The big ones, of course, are interested there: there is something to do and mom is nearby. But the children hardly play with each other. Maybe they just got caught that all strangers gathered among themselves?

None of the parents spoke to each other either, everyone read magazines. It seems that many mothers come there to relax, do their own thing, read. It's hard for me to judge, perhaps, mothers of older children really get very tired of this mess at home, and they need to be distracted. But personally, I would like more communication.

Tanya:
It seems to me that the "Door" is needed to relieve the child's transition from mother's hands to the big world, and not to develop specific skills - to communicate and behave in society. I was there today, and my one-year-old child led an independent life for an hour and a half (!), Occasionally checking to see if his mother had abandoned him. Thoughts:

If mom at that moment had run away to a stall or the like, no toys and funny friends would have forced him to leave mom in this (or another) place next time.

Everyone behaves naturally: not as in class (to the question of games), but as in life. I quietly sat in the corner with a book, not bothering anyone, and Maxim gave each new visitor a separate cute face.

Children like it there. So someone needs it?

Nobody teaches us how to be parents. But this is the most important and most difficult thing!

I learned about this center from my friend.

The Green Door Center for Early Socialization was opened in 1995 in Moscow. And it still exists.

Many of its graduates are already finishing school ..

It is very strange that there are no other such centers.

Green door for children from 0 to 3 years old. Here is their website [link], where you can see the opening hours, address and photo.

When we went there, we were scared, but very curious.

We have a small but very sociable daughter who is drawn to both adults and children. She lacks communication. She is happy to play with someone, but so far she is so young that she does not know how to interact with children. Soon she will go to the short day group.

How everything works.

Everything turned out to be much better than we imagined.

• Two rooms for games
• canteen
• a place for changing clothes for babies with a changing table where you can change a diaper
• bathroom
• restroom.

What's in the playroom?

Large playhouse, slide, strollers, cars, books, board with markers and much more. Everything is clean, just play.

What surprises right away and from the doorway is that they talk to a child like an adult.

They get to know him. His name, age and who he came with are written on the board.

And they explain the rules of conduct.

You should have seen with what attention the children listen to them.

The rules are simple:

• The child comes to the Green Door with his parents (grandmothers, grandfathers) and leaves with them.

This does not hurt the child. He knows that at any moment he can climb into the arms of mom or dad.

Oh, I remember how they sent my younger sister to kindergarten and she asked my mother if she would really take her away.

• You can eat only in a specially designated place.

This rule was the most difficult for our dad.

You can drive a typewriter without leaving the lanes.

• Parents on the territory of the "Door" influence the child not with their hands, but with their words.

It always seemed to me that during walks my husband abstracts.

But when I saw his behavior from the outside, I realized that I was wrong.

He did not leave Alice a step.

Do you know how much you can learn about your child if you just watch him from the outside?

It is immediately clear what he is interested in playing, and most importantly, how much he can do himself.

All this time "educators" are with you - these are psychologists and teachers.

They help explain and understand the feelings and actions of the child, as well as your attitude towards them.

A child on the territory of the "Door" receives invaluable experience - his own.

He learns to interact with other children without the help of parents. Learns to change toys, talk, give in, negotiate.

Each person determines the time when to come and go.

We stayed for two hours and left without tears.

Leaving the playground is always a challenge for us. the educators advised us to be persistent and tell the child, as an adult, that we played great today, but it's time for us to go home and we will definitely come again.

Alice listened to all this, took my hand and we went to get dressed.

Price

It's not a secret for anyone how much classes with children in Moscow cost in Moscow.

This center is free.

There is a piggy bank near the entrance, in which the parents put as much as they see fit. This money is used to buy toys, pay for the work of educators.

The walls are decorated with pictures of little guests.